Jennings - Tom Fool 4.0%

Taste: Slips down easily, soothing your troubles away. Makes you think of words beginning with W. A creative beer.

Would I buy 2? Yes

Would I buy 4? Depends on the choice available

Appearance like tasty vinegar

Rating *****5

Buckleys - Best Bitter 3.7%

Taste is watery but makes me anticipate a meal, maybe a lovely lamb lunch. Great as an aperitif

Would I buy 2? not really bothered, I'd want to eat after the first one. I'd eat the glass if necessary

Would I buy 4? probably not

Appearance like a deep burning red. In a good way, not like cellulitis or anything

Rating ****4

Morland - Original Bitter 4.0%

Taste is really full, rather like an entire meal in itself. A cliche that is often associated with Guinness, but this is more mellow in flavour.

Would I buy 2? Maybe, if I wanted to get fat

Would I buy 4? No, it's far too full on

Appearance Quite golden. Only quite. I can tell the difference between this and a pint of genuine liquid gold.

Rating *****5

Atlas Brewery - Nimbus 5.0%

Taste: The cadbury's caramel bunny lives on, within this golden, rich pint of ale. But I won't succumb to her dulcet tones as one of these ales is enough for any man. You may want to have one after dinner instead of a whole treacle tart... I'd say "Lets all enjoy a cadbury's ale!".

Would you buy 2? No, couldn't buy 2, too rich and caramaccy.

Would you buy 4? Only sugar junkies could buy 4... plenty more ales in the sea.

Appearance: Thick creamy head. Most likely to be made of whipped sugar and a thick golden brown ale, a result of having the cadbury's bunny actually inside it.

Rating (out of 7): * * * *4

Triple FFF - Pressed Rat & Warthog 3.8%

Taste: Stout so dark it stings the lips with hoppy goodness! Ow! Awesome taste. It's still stinging... Rock on!

Would you buy 2? Yeah, if it was a bit colder.... constant flow.

Would you buy 4? Few men could ever drink 4 in the summer.

Appearance: Dark as night, Warthog marketing perhaps misses a little. Although on closer inspection, I see that the warthog is living in a dark world. Still wasn't expecting the darkness. But I am prepared now.

Rating (out of 7): * * * *4

Newby Wyke Brewery - HMS Revenge 4.2%

2Taste: Tastes like an old sailor has sat with his feet in the cask during the fermenting process. I feel like it's taking things from me instead of giving me anything new. A parasitic ale. I can't think of anything else but feet. I'm stuck on it! .... Don't smell this one...

Would you buy 2? No. Certainly not!

Would you buy 4? No way, i'd be hard pushed to ever buy one again!

Appearance: Suspiciously cloudy.... I don't think this should be cloudy... Could be the yeast infection???

Rating (out of 7): * *2 (shame, great name... goes to show that revenge and ale do not mix)

Oakham Ales - Helter Skelter 5.0%

Taste: A Bit Gucky and Syrupy. Like Tennants super Strength. A Bit of a lad ale.

Would you buy 2? Not unless I was homeless.

Would you buy 4? If I got a free A3 laminated poster of the artwork I would.

Appearance: Extra marks! Like a Voodoo Lady. 60's psychedelia mixed with carnival folk feel. Wow factor got these ales bought!

Rating (out of 7): * * * *4

Blackawton Brewery - Exhibition Ale 4.2%

Taste: For a 'unique' ale, this is highly unremarkable.
S T A N D A R D I S S U E . Nice though....

Would you buy 2? Move on, just move on.

Would you buy 4? Need not ask.

Appearance: Like Iron Bru.

Rating (out of 7): * *2 (disappointing)

Phoenix Brewery - Pale Moonlight 4.2%

Taste: I'm struggling with this one; i've hit a watery plateau. Not much to say, apart from it gives ale a bad name.

Would you buy 2? Actually, i'd have two, it's whet my whistle.

Would you buy 4? Not in heaven or on earth. I wouldn't give my ale money to this sleaze peddler.
Appearance: Very light, almost like a very strong lager.

Rating (out of 7): * *2

Salatapder Brewing Company - Albatross 4%

Taste: As the name suggests, trying to review this ale has become, itself, a bit of an albatross. With it's ultra light cut, this ale really lends itself to long lazy summer days. Once it's in your mouth, you get what you get. There are no ugly aftertastes lurking in the liquid shadows.

Appearance: So light, it's almost not there.

Would you buy 2? Yup, i'd buy two.

Would you buy 4? If the weather was right. Definitely not for winter.


Rating (out of 7): * * * * *5

Church End Brewery - Cuthbert's 3.8%

Taste: A very bitter and incredibly sharp ale; quite hardcore and would suit a winter scene. Not for the faint hearted.

Would you buy 2? In The right circumstances.

Would you buy 4? If I was trying to read the whole of wuthering heights in one day on the yorkshire moors... yes.

Appearance: A proud English oak.

Rating (out of 7): * * * *4

Badger - Blandford Fly 5.2%

Taste: Sweet ginger with a strong spicy character. The Fly's got a hell of a bite!

Would you buy 2? Yes, the ginger spice is the best party that has ever been held in my mouth and my tongue won't stop talking about it.

Would you buy 4? I Wouldn't buy 4, after two it would start to taste like medicine. A bit too crazy a women to party with all night.

Appearance: Tawny, light, golden brown. Looks quite like Tizer.

Rating (out of 7): * * * * *5

The Marlow Brewery - Rebellion Overthrow 4.4%

Taste: Tastes cool and light like a summer festival lager, but aley. Smells meaty.... This is great stuff.

Would you buy 2? Alright let's pool our change!

Would you buy 4? With all the choice available, this would be absolute madness

Appearance: Dark and deceptive.

Rating (out of 7): * * * *4

LB - Samba 4.1%

Taste: On 1st taste, this is a very light, almost watery ale, But after a few sips it becomes apparent that it is actually a very light, almost watery but refreshing, summer ale.

Would you buy 2? Yeah, it's light and gives me fruity pleasure!

Would you buy 4? Yeah I could have a good night on this train.

Appearance: Atrocious Pump Label / Atrocious Brown

Rating (out of 7): * * * *4

Inveralmond Brewery - Inki Pinki 3.7%

Taste: My god, this is so light it almost doesn't exist! But good times over all. Tastes sweet like a honey bear's paws. Boy Oh Boy!

Would you buy 2? Not today sir, I'm not in the mood.

Would you buy 4? In another life perhaps. But I just can't go on when there are 9 more beers to try here!

Appearance: I can't tell, it's too weak.

Rating (Out Of 7): 4 * * * * (weak but tasty)