Keltek Brewery - Cardrew IPA 3.8%

Taste: Watery, yet flavoursome. hoppy fruit and a bitter afterlick. Nice! From the home of Aphex Twin and the UK's weirdest cinema too.

Appearance: Ilford Delta 400.

Would you buy 2? Yes!

Would you buy 4? Yes please!

Rating (out of 7): 5*****

Skinner's - Cornish Blonde 5%

Taste: Tangy. Lemony. Fizz. This is clean tasting. Nice, but. It close to the draught. It's so light tasting. Deceptively strong. There's not much to say. Not Skinner's best.

Appearance: yellow straw and lemons.

Would you buy 2? not bottled.

Would you buy 4? Draught all day. But this is the bottle.

Rating (out of 7): 3*** it's drinkable. Not incredible.

Location:Beaufoys Ave,Ferndown,United Kingdom

St. Ives Brewery - Boilers Golden Cornish Ale 4%

Taste: The lights go dim. The crowd roars, and the announcer cries out "ladies and gentlemen, it's Ale time!"

Just as those famous words will begin every performance by St. Ives brewery, they are the perfect words to describe what you are in for when you drop this ale on your table and spin it. Herein you shall find many gems that will be staples in St Ives brewery for years to come. But taste them, all in one powerful ale. And baby does this ale have something for everybody! You may feel this ale is a lesson in funky brewing. Its the coolest ale you'll ever see, brought to you by St Ives Brewery.

Appearance: standing drinking alone, two hands that hold and finger the ale glass. One mouth that drinks an ale but nobody else's ale, only St Ives ale.

Would you buy 2? if you will teach me to make ale, I will teach you to make love. That's a yes.

Would you buy 4? Out of unfathomed depths of ocean this ale rises like a radiant maiden glorifying the night. As it reveals its beauty the earth and sky, indeed all nature adores it.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** this whole ale conjures up pictures of hot sunny beaches, beautiful girls, bronzed young men and surf boards. An ale that will tempt you to roll back the carpet, invite some friends, and have a party.

Skinner's - Christmas Fairy 3.9%

Taste: Classically delicious ale from Skinners. They can do no wrong. Light, biscuity and delicious. I think I could drink this forever.

Appearance: light brown, like Labrador eyes.

Would you buy 2? Yes please. Although I didn't pay for this one.

Would you buy 4? I predict that 4 would go down in about 37 minutes.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** classic brown.

Location:Lavender Gardens,,United Kingdom

Skinner's - Sennen 3.8%

Taste: Flowery, with hints of flour. A slight after taste of swimming pool changing mats.

Appearance: Yellow. No other word will do.

Would you buy 2?: No, it's nice, but not what I was hoping for.

Would you buy 4?: Not likely, more delicious ales to try.

Rating (out of 7): 3***. Average, and drinkable, but nothing special. The carnation in the bouquet!

Location:Cornwall.

Skinner's - Hunny Bunny 4.5%

Taste: Glorious! This is a beer that makes me happy. Honey, and Ale. Much less anxious than before I tasted it. An antidote. A cure!

Appearance: Perfect pale ale.

Would you buy 2?: Yes, just you try and stop me.

Would you buy 4?: In a heartbeat.

Rating (out of 7): 6******. This ones a winner! A very good job, I'd like to thank the brewer personally if I get the chance. Second thoughts that sounds a little sleazy. I'll have to think about it.

Location:Cornwall.

Skinner's - Sunset Watering Hole 3.9%

Taste: skinners of Truro have done it again. The perfect beer to enjoy in the perfect county! Summer in a glass!

Appearance: too dark to tell.

Would you buy 2? Yes. And will

Would you buy 4? Of course. I'll go to the brewery and swim in it!

Rating (out of 7): ******6 awesome!

Location:Dorothy Rd,Wandsworth,United Kingdom

Skinner's - St. Pirran's Ale 4.5%

Taste: So drinkable. A fuzzy burst of goodness on your tongue. Smooth, not too sweet and a hint of a brass goblet. Tastes like it has been stirred with an asparagus tip and this is good! Easy to gulp, if ale is required quickly.

Appearance: Golden brown carpet.

Would you buy 2? They would slip down in an easy hazy way.

Would you buy 4? Yes, especially if you were in a rush to drink a delicious ale.

Rating: * * * * * *

Skinner's - Cornish Knocker 4.9%

Taste: Mallowy... licking a zinc pipe... waxy leaves. But all ever so subtle.

Appearance: Holding it up to your eyes is like wearing a futuristic orange visor. Recommended.

Would you buy 2? When by the sea, of course.

Would you buy 4? Possibly, but I'm hesitating for some reason.

Rating: * * * * *

Skinner's - Heligan Honey 4%

Taste: Rack off wasps, this honey drop is mine! But wait, how much honey goodness is in here? Not enough for an average size bee! This ale needs more going on. The words 'bland noodles' have just been uttered... Gosh! Overall, it is refreshing and drinkable but a little unexciting.

Would you buy 2? Yes I would! One for you, one for me.

Would you buy 4? Not enough excitement to drink four.

Rating: * * * *

Skinner's - Betty Stoggs 4%

Taste: A lovely warm hug from a friendly golden retriever! Warm and furry with a slight hint of shiney coins. A cosy ale, perfect for a rainy summers day!

Appearance: Foamy head leaves a satisfying residue on the glass. A handsome brown ale.

Would you buy 2? Good God yes!

Would you buy 4? Four could easily slip down....

Rating: * * * * * *

Skinner's - Figgy's Brew 4.9%

Taste: Not figgy, but that's not a disappointment; although it does taste like a brew, and what a brew! Almost stewy but quite light, Smells strong, like physical education.

Would you buy 2? Yeah, it's great fun! Keep it coming.

Would you buy 4? As long as it stays fun, keep it coming! So Mealy.

Appearance: A good solid orangey brown.... Like teddy bears eyes.

Rating (out of 7): • • • • •