Edale Brewery - Wondering Albatross 6%

Taste: dry like sherry. Would be excellent with a butter + sugar pancake. I feel it's strength! Marzipan finish.

Appearance: it moves as one.

Would you buy 2? Yeah!!!

Would you buy 4? I'd take a whole barrel.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** when you drink it out of the wine glass it affects 'things'

Location:Edale

Kelham Island - Pale Rider 5.2%

Taste: hard to taste over the scampi fries. I imagine it's nice though. Chalky alkaline. Grit stone slabs.

Appearance: scampi fry with chalky cliff head.

Would you buy 2? Yeah. I have and would again. Litmus paper pleasing.

Would you buy 4? Not today. But if I was feeling less shabby.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** delicious edge smoother.

Location:Edale, peak district

Skinner's - Sennen 3.8%

Taste: Flowery, with hints of flour. A slight after taste of swimming pool changing mats.

Appearance: Yellow. No other word will do.

Would you buy 2?: No, it's nice, but not what I was hoping for.

Would you buy 4?: Not likely, more delicious ales to try.

Rating (out of 7): 3***. Average, and drinkable, but nothing special. The carnation in the bouquet!

Location:Cornwall.

Skinner's - Hunny Bunny 4.5%

Taste: Glorious! This is a beer that makes me happy. Honey, and Ale. Much less anxious than before I tasted it. An antidote. A cure!

Appearance: Perfect pale ale.

Would you buy 2?: Yes, just you try and stop me.

Would you buy 4?: In a heartbeat.

Rating (out of 7): 6******. This ones a winner! A very good job, I'd like to thank the brewer personally if I get the chance. Second thoughts that sounds a little sleazy. I'll have to think about it.

Location:Cornwall.

Greene King - Ale Fresco

Taste: I was promised citrus but it's masked under a blanket of egg. A toffee dog, barking in the distance.

Appearance: untrustworthy

Would you buy 2? We did. I'd do it again.

Would you buy 4? No sir'ee

Rating (out of 7): ****4 not all bad

Location:Clapham old town

Thwaites - Old Dan 7.4%

Taste: Christ! You've just gotta grip it and rip it with this mother. You're brown baggin' it, roughing it, slumming it with this one. Tastes like fizz pop, dirt sugar, earth water.

Appearance: Copper pots

Would you buy 2?: No, I don't think I would.

Would you buy 4?: 4 Old Dan's? I'm too pure, these are dirty.

Rating: 3*** I think this is for tough guys, men that toil the earth and lift cars. I can't take it, I'm too darn soft!

Location:Wimbledon

Morland - Old Crafty Hen 6.5%

Taste: This is insanely light! You can't feel it touching your skin! It's not from this earth I tells ya. I like this ale, it's got a homing beacon, a heat seeking missile, as soon as it's released it tries to get into your mouth and work it's way down into your gizzards!

Appearance: A colour of sorts to be sure.. It changes though, this ale is alive!

Would you buy 2?: Oh yes, yes I would!

Would you buy 4?: Hot dang! Why not! All bets are off!

Rating: 6******! I prefer my hens crafty, not speckled! All the awards are well deserved!

Location:Wimbledon