Shipyard Brewing Co. - IPA 5.8%

Taste: Sweet, tangy hops. It's not that delicious. Tart orange squash.

Appearance: cloudy orange.

Would you buy 2? No thanks.

Would you buy 4? Nope.

Rating (out of 7): 3***

Freedom - Organic Lager 4.8%

Taste: Tastes like being stung in the mouth by wasps. Munching your way through a foam party. The general opinion is that it's delicious but dense.

Appearance: fizz pop.

Would you buy 2? We have 200.

Would you buy 4? We have 200.

Rating (out of 7): 4****

Location:United Kingdom

Greene King - IPA Reserve 5.4%

Taste: It smells pretty exciting. A hoppy, tropical fruit explosion. Grapefruit face rub. It might all be a bit much. But it's very welcome from Greene king.

Appearance: Amber adequacy.

Would you buy 2? I've lost interest with each sip. So maybe not.

Would you buy 4? Doubtful.

Rating (out of 7): 4**** not bad.

Dorset Brewing Co. - Spring Equinox 4.6%

Taste: smooth, malty pleasure-gulp. Very light tasting. Breaded water. It's curing my ales. Doesn't taste like any American beer I've tasted, though.

Appearance: red, amber-brown.

Would you buy 2? I wish.

Would you buy 4? Yes please

Rating (out of 7): *****5 lovely stuff. Well played, Dorset.

Highland Brewing Co. - St. Magnus 5.2%

Taste: Sterile. In a good way. Medicinal like old germoline. Citrus. People are keen. Copper mine?

Appearance: crystal clear.

Would you buy 2? We bought 6.

Would you buy 4? No.

Rating (out of 7): 3***

Location:Stoney Street,Camberwell,United Kingdom

Griffin Inn - Pain in the Arse 3.7%

Taste: Stump lick!! Smoked Kipper. Oaky. Helles wheat (men's toilet urinal cakes).

Appearance: Cloud puffs.

Would you buy 2? We bought five. Accidentally

Would you buy 4? See above

Rating (out of 7): 2** too guffy

Cumbrian Ales - Buttermere Beauty 4.8%

Taste: Dubious water. Dissolved toffees. Nasty Bread. Standing Water.

Appearance: Old Banana skins.

Would you buy 2? We bought 4.

Would you buy 4? We bought four. Accidentally.

Rating (out of 7): 3***

Cottage Brewing - Light Brigade 4.7%

Taste: Sweet, thick. This is exactly What we were after. Goes great with cheap cigars. Strong, brown, hot ale.

Appearance: off but brown.

Would you buy 2? We bought 4.

Would you buy 4? We bought 4.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** enjoyable!

Wharfbank Brewey - Try This 3.7%

Taste: A slightly sulphurous wave followed by a sharp tang. This is a fairly standard, although tasty brew.

Appearance: Rugby based. I hadn't realised. Copper beer.

Would you buy 2? Not today.

Would you buy 4? Not tonight!

Rating (out of 7): 4****

Caledonian - Dry Dock (4.1%)

Taste: A metallic latte mixed with OXO.

Appearance: Ink and water.

Would you buy 2? Not today.

Would you buy 4? Not this year.

Rating (out of 7): 3***

Arbor Ales - Weißbier 4.6%

Taste: This bottle exploded everywhere on opening. A bad start. Taste is okay. Like a Christmassy version of lucozade or a barley squash. It kind of sits badly on the tongue. If be lying if I said its a 100% enjoyable gulp.

Appearance: Explosive, dehydrated yellow.

Would you buy 2? No thanks.

Would you buy 4? Not likely. I'm a little gutted I didn't buy one of Arbor's really delicious beers.

Rating (out of 7): 3*** not for me, thanks.

Arbor Ales - Brigstow Bitter 4.3%

Taste: I thought I was going to get a session bitter. But this is more like a Belgium beer. It tastes totally different to their description. Perhaps it was switched at birth. But I doubt it. I've been thrown. It has all the medicinal charm of a bottle of Duval.

Appearance: Copper. Nice drawing on the label.

Would you buy 2? I might not.

Would you buy 4? Not for me, thanks.

Rating (out of 7): 4**** It's still great tasting beer. But it's misleading.

Redchurch Brewery - Shoreditch Blonde 4.5%

Taste: Smells less like a blonde and more like weak squash. Luckily the taste is wonderful. It's hard to describe. But it can be likened to biting into a brown bread, flower sandwich. Petals, stamen. The whole shebang. Nice.

Appearance: Ghostly yellow.

Would you buy 2? I would.

Would you buy 4? I could, very quickly.

Rating (out of 7): 5*****

Stone Brewing Co. - Levitation Ale 4.4%

Taste: This reeks of grapefruit. It has a sweet hop-drop on the tongue. More tingly than their other beers but I'm down with that. It has a partial malty bread aftertaste which kicks in after 10 seconds.

Appearance: Kevin Spacey's tan. Beelzebub is back on the bottle.

Would you buy 2? Yes. I'd like my chilly-bin chocked full of these.

Would you buy 4? Yes please.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** if you like things hoppy, you'll not be dissapointed.

Bristol Beer Factory - Smoked Chili Chipotle 5%

Taste: This sounded so disgusting that I had to try it. Buts it's actual genius! Smokey and lightly spicy. It's an Irish stout on holiday. Best yet, it doesn't taste like a novelty.

Appearance: Slightly darker than Coke.

Would you buy 2? I would. Yes.

Would you buy 4? You'd have to ask me after three.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** Another interesting one from Bristol.

Hogswood - Broken Piston 4.2%

Taste: Road tar. Very fumey. The exact taste has been pin pointed as bitumen. Suprisingly this isn't a bad thing.

Appearance: Waistcoat mahogany

Would you buy 2? If it was a frosty morn, yes.

Would you buy 4? Not sure when.

Rating (out of 7): 4 * * * *

Driftwood Spars - Lou's Brew 5%

Taste: Tri- chloro phenol. Party popper smoke. Too chemically for it's own good.

Appearance: Ginger ale

Would you buy 2? I wish I hadn't had one.

Would you buy 4? Good God no.

Rating (out of 7): 2 * *

Fry's - Golden Armour 4.7%

Taste: Port! Light fizzy port! Smooth and tastes like fine quality. Unmistakably port like.

Appearance: Smooth fox

Would you buy 2? Yes

Would you buy 4? Definitely in halves

Rating (out of 7): 5 * * * * *

Tintagel - Arthur's Ale 4.4%

This review was compiled by three reviewers, each only allowed one taste description word each!

Taste: Earthy, barky and autumnal.

Appearance: Turbid brown

Would you buy 2? Why not?

Would you buy 4? Perhaps

Rating (out of 7): 4 * * * *

Stone Brewing Co. - Sublimely Self-Righteous Ale 8.7%

Taste: I'm wildly excited about drinking this one. Pricey at £12 so the stakes are high... It has an incredible smell of sweet, hoppy booze. My god. Do you remember the scene from Indiana Jones when the guy drinks from the wrong Grail and melts to his bones? That just happened to me. This is fiercely hopped with some deep fruity flavours and a some malts too.

Appearance: I've been told off by the brewery. Apparently the character on the labels of their beers is a Gargoyle. Not Satan. (Although I asked my wife what she thought it was and she said "it's clearly the devil". Beer is a dark, handsome brown.

Would you buy 2? I wish I could afford to.

Would you buy 4? Again. I'd happily accept a crate of these from the kind folk at Stone.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** Worth the price tag.

Copper Dragon - Black Gold 4%

Taste: Based on a recipe from the 1800's, apparently. You can taste the centuries gone by. A slightly oily yet watery porter style Beer. Malty toast fest.

Appearance: Dark waters.

Would you buy 2? I could drink 2.

Would you buy 4? I'd probably move on to something else by then.

Rating (out of 7): 4**** nice stuff.

Andwell Brewing Company - King John 4.6%

Taste: A malt-tease scent. Hmmm there's a lot of a metallic bottle top taste. I'm sure that's not meant to be there. Apart from the copper taste, it's a pretty smooth and tasty ale.

Appearance: The beer looks great. So clear!

Would you buy 2? Unlikely. But I'd accept two as a gift.

Would you buy 4? Don't think so. But I'd like to try it on keg.

Rating (out of 7): 4****

Stone Brewing Co. - Stone IPA 6.9%

Taste: Another one from Stone. Again, it smells amazing. A bit like Pop Rox the popping candy. It's mega hoppy and wildly dry. My moisture!!!! What have you done with my moisture?!

Appearance: Jurassic Park amber. Satan's back on the bottle.

Would you buy 2? I just might.

Would you buy 4? I would shrivel and die. Too dry for four.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** Great stuff if you like arid conditions.

The Stone Brewing Co. - Oaked Arrogant Bastard Ale 7.2%

Taste: My word. That smells good! Aromas of bread crust gave me flashbacks of feeding the ducks. Wow. The taste has blown my mind. Tastes of vanilla, wood, marmite and twiglets. Quite amazing.

Appearance: The devil on the bottle is very rude. You should hear the things he's saying! Hmm. Beer is redwood brown.

Would you buy 2? I would consider it a privilege.

Would you buy 4? Too strong to drink all at once. But I'd want to own four.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** amazing.

Goose Island - 312 Urban Wheat Ale 4.4%

Taste: Wow, that's very nice. its like sucking on a sweet wheat sheaf or a bit like lucozade orange, if it was nice. Isotonic.

Appearance: straw yellow. I hate that it's described as an "urban" wheat beer. Oh well.

Would you buy 2? I think I'd like two now. I only have one.

Would you buy 4? Probably could drink four. Or maybe more.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** lovely

Bristol Beer Factory - Milk Stout 4.5%

Taste: A bold stout. Sharp, not smooth. Sticky, black sap. But, very nice. I'm getting liquorice and rain water.

Appearance: brown foam. Black liquid. Nice bottle.

Would you buy 2? Maybe so.

Would you buy 4? Maybe not.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** A bold stout.

Beavertown Brewery - Smog Rocket Smoked Porter 5.4%

Taste: Very smokey. Yet watery. Smoke on the water. It's going down well. Better than expected. It smells a bit like a permanent marker.

Appearance: Brown mist.

Would you buy 2? I might give this one a miss.

Would you buy 4? I'd accept four.

Rating (out of 7): 4**** interesting. But not for me.

Arbor Ales - Phoenix Stout 4.3%

Taste: Phew. The description of this on the bottle sounded disgusting. But it works well. A "bucket of dates and smoked malt" scared the bejesus out of me. It does taste very smokey but it's pleasant. For some reason, I'm getting an aniseed flavour too. (Someone's aniseed ball fell in when they were creating this "freestyle Friday" brew?)

Appearance: Too dark to tell.

Would you buy 2? I could sink two.

Would you buy 4? Perhaps!

Rating (out of 7): 5***** sounds like a happy accident. Kudos.

Beavertown Brewery - Black Betty IPA 7.2%

Taste: Smokey Lager Overtones. Bacon malt aftertaste. What a ride. It feels hot in my throat like a whiskey. Sweet tonic.

Appearance: Brown bear wearing a cappuccino hat. Cool artwork on bottle.

Would you buy 2? I think I would.

Would you buy 4? Yeah! To be drunk non-consecutively however.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** I like you.

Arbor Ales - Hoptical Delusion II 3.8%

Taste: Another unfiltered one from arbor. The hops are sharper in this, which I love. Lemon razorblade. It's all about the hops here. No further comments.

Appearance: yellow clouds.

Would you buy 2? I would.

Would you buy 4? I'd love to, but these hops would dry you out!

Rating (out of 7): 5***** delicious!

Arbor Ales - Man V Beer 4.4%

Taste: An unfiltered pale ale from Arbor. On first taste I was confused by the weak hop flavours. Then it hit me, it feels as though an oily hop-snake is crawling down my throat leaving it's buttery residue as it goes. but In a good way. It feels unusual in the mouth. Tingly.

Appearance: Cloudy Yellow.

Would you buy 2? I would.

Would you buy 4? Yes please.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** delicious!

Camden Brewery - Ink Stout 4.4%

Taste: A very smooth creme stout. It cures what ales you and it goes well with a plate of mushrooms, it turns out. Very fresh tasting.

Appearance: ink black. Unsurprisingly. It looks so good to me.

Would you buy 2? I'd love to.

Would you buy 4? Yes please.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** the best stout I've tasted in an age.

Location:Elgin Avenue,Paddington,United Kingdom

The Kernel Brewery / Brodie's - Scanner Darkly Black IPA 6.9%

Taste: Hmm. It's a little sudsy. Hop entrée. Soap main and slate desert. It's tasty, for sure. But how much can one man really take?

Appearance: Keanu Reeves based. I've never seen that before. Normal Kernal label. But with a Brodie's Stamp.

Would you buy 2? I might not.

Would you buy 4? No thanks. Head to one of their export stouts for a good time.

Rating (out of 7): 4**** not a crushing dissapointment, but not one of their best.

Beavertown - Gamma Ray 5.4%

Taste: A mysterious brewery that has no obvious origin. And I'll be damned if I'm typing that into google. I prefer to imagine an actual 'Beaver Town'.... They're all washing their bellies with a smile on their furry chops.... Anyway.... I got hit, initially by a candied hop blast. It's hoppy alright. But it has something I can't place. It's great stuff. Very drinkable.

Appearance: Copper hop. Great bottle art.

Would you buy 2? I would.

Would you buy 4? To look at the UFO art.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** it's almost a six. It probably would have been if I hadn't just chugged another massively hoppy ale.

Ska Brewing Co. - Modus Hoperandi IPA 6.8%

Taste: Smells like a pine forest.... Tastes like one too. I'm covered in sap. Powerful hop explosion followed by some old biscuits and a bite of hovis. Lovely stuff.

Appearance: Canned, which I like. Beer has the classic colour of teddybear-eye orange.

Would you buy 2? I would. I like pine.

Would you buy 4? Can someone buy them for me?

Rating (out of 7): 5***** it's really lovely.