Ordnance City - Festival 4.7%

Taste: Very malty. Sweet, thick and delicious. Veggiemite has been mentioned. I overheard another table describe it as marmite.

Appearance: Pint of Coke.

Would you buy 2? We did.

Would you buy 4? Not today. But I would.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** very drinkable.

Copper Dragon - Black Gold 4%

Taste: Based on a recipe from the 1800's, apparently. You can taste the centuries gone by. A slightly oily yet watery porter style Beer. Malty toast fest.

Appearance: Dark waters.

Would you buy 2? I could drink 2.

Would you buy 4? I'd probably move on to something else by then.

Rating (out of 7): 4**** nice stuff.

The Kernel Brewery - Export India Porter 6.1%

Taste: That's nice! Lighter than I expected. Lots of toasted flavours in there. Malty. It's paired my homemade chips and tamarind sauce nicely. My word, it's very easy drinking for it's strength!

Appearance: Mahogany. stained Oak. Classic bottle, now with not so good font.

Would you buy 2? Yes please.

Would you buy 4? Of course. I told you!!!

Rating (out of 7): 6****** lovely stuff!

Box Steam Brewery - Funnel Blower 4.5%

Taste: Nice! Creme Brulé! Now that's gone, and i'm left with the chalk rich hills of Wiltshire. This has a plump taste. Yes... Plump. Nice stuff.

Appearance: black. Summery looking label.

Would you buy 2? Defo!

Would you buy 4? it could be done.... Someone here smells like my old guitar teacher's house. I've gotta go...

Rating (out of 7): 5***** lovely!

Location:Bedfordbury,London,United Kingdom

Magic Rock Brewing - Dark Arts Surreal Stout 6%

Taste: Smooth! It grows in the mouth. Strange. The kind of way over-fizzy coke does. I can taste liquorice and cut grass. Because Magic Rock beers are usually transcendental, this feels a bit like a let down, although it is still highly delicious.

Appearance: Great bottle design. Dark beer.

Would you buy 2? Yes!

Would you buy 4? I could, for friends.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** still a high scorer.

Location:Wimbledon

Untapped Brewing Co. - Eclipse 4.4%

Taste: Smooth, silky, sits on the tongue, then slips away. Deep and rich,yet spiky.

Appearance: Light Soy sauce on a winter's eve.

Would you buy 2? Certainly

Would you buy 4? Only with Zebra steak

Rating (out of 7): 5*****

Windsor & Eton Brewery - Conqueror Black IPA 5%

Taste: I'm opening this to celebrate the birth of my first daughter. I'm hoping for big things here. It has an absolutely incredible smell. Lovely rich hop aroma. I could smell this ale all day. Amazing. The taste is equally impressive; malt attack! Some malty ghosts are running over the roof of my mouth and down my throat. It might be not sleeping for 3 days, but I'm sure that's happening. It's sweet and bitter and bold. Impressive. It beats The Kernel Breweries Black IPA. Well done.

Appearance: Very, very dark. Nice griffins and shield on label.

Would you buy 2? For sure. Without hesitation.

Would you buy 4? I could be seen buying four. Or more.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** definitely a high sixer! Flawless bottled beer.

Location:Wimbledon Common

Fallen Angel Micro Brewery - Howlin' Red Ale 6.4%

Taste: oh, it stinks!!! Oh no.... UNdrinkable? Shock!!!! Yucky noises!!! Bloody hell. This is terrible. Sweet homebrew, but not drinkable. Bloody terrible. Who would release this out to the world. It must be a mistake. A bad batch of balsamic vinegar.

Appearance: The dog on the label no way represents the beer within.

Would you buy 2? Never. One was a terrible mistake. First sip gave me cramp.

Would you buy 4? This question is an insult.

Rating (out of 7): ZERO stars. Both have been left. There must rue some mistake. What's happened to this ale??? I can't believe that we waited until after midnight to drink this as the label suggests. Least amount of ale consumed on any review ever..... There must be something wrong here.

Location:Warwick St,Cardiff,United Kingdom

Cromarty - Brewed Awakening 4.7%

Taste: Strong coffee! Like original Amazonian coffee or cocoa. Perfect before a ceremonial dance around the fire. Very drinkable, very nice, don't you think... yes.

Appearance: A starry night with volcano embers in the background. A pair of rubies sit at the bottom of the pint.

Would you buy 2? Surprisingly for a stout, yes I would. If I could handle it, I'd enjoy it.

Would you buy 4? Unlikely to make it that far. The rubies would be too heavy. I don't have a goose to smuggle those rubies in.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** Fancy an ale, and a coffee? This should be your choice.

Young's - London Porter 4.4%

Taste: Metallic pleasure. A bit like coke has made and ale. Everything that hits my mouth is awesome. Nice stuff.

Appearance: black. Dark.

Would you buy 2? I might. Next.

Would you buy 4? Not tonight.

Rating (out of 7): 4****

Location:Garratt Ln,London,United Kingdom

Black Sheep Brewery - Celebration Ale 6%

Taste: I'm expecting to taste the difference here... Sainsbury's have sold this to me, it sounds right up my street; with port and raisins mentioned.... Let's see. First sip is a woozy journey through about 10 tastes. I had a flashback to eating a lot of christmas cake and gorging on marzipan. The port and fruitiness is there, but it's been locked in the basement. This is halfway to tasting like a fine cigar and would probably be a fine pairing.

Appearance: Guinness and Port. Sainsbury bottle shifting units for black sheep.

Would you buy 2? I actually would. Not bad.

Would you buy 4? I don't know about four. Some of my friends don't like liquorice and probably wouldn't get such a big bang out of this.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** A generous score for some nice work. Huzzah!

Visit Black Sheep Brewery Website

Dark Star - Winter Meltdown 5%

Taste: A real Christmassy blast on this clement spring day. Oranges with cloves. Vending machine squash from the 80's (think brown cups and leisure centres). It's a spicy beast.

Appearance: Chestnut brown. Red label.

Would you buy 2? I have two next to me. I have no regrets.

Would you buy 4? I don't think I'd be ashamed with four.... Proud?

Rating (out of 7): 4**** I fine shot indeed.

Location:Windmill Walk,London,United Kingdom

XT Breweing Co. - NINE Black Velvet 5.5%

Taste:  A complex dark beer, is it a stout? no not really it's more like a black Belgian Double or 12 but with more hop character. Despite this you can actually drink several of them, which is rather dangerous.

Appearance: Pours almost black, but with a deep mahogany colour if examined closely. Cream coloured head. Pump clip uber-simple nothing but the name and brewery.

Would you buy 2? Oh yes, it's very repeatable, the lovely smokey, malty flavours are something you can't just do the once.

Would you buy 4? Yes, I would buy several.

Rating (out of 7): 6******

Kindly submitted by The London Drinker (We don't know who you are, but are you connected with the London Drinker beer fest?)

Visit the XT Brewing Co.

Hook Norton Brewery - Hooky Dark 3.2%

Taste: Raisins. Malty. Full bodied pleasure. Light and drinkable, you could really lose yourself In an ale like this.

Appearance: panda cola. Not too dark. Witchy label.

Would you buy 2? Please.

Would you buy 4? I could. If you were thirsty.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** I love ale

Location:Scott arms, Kingston Dorset.

Rhymney - Dark 4%

Taste: chorizo scented. So meaty. Tastes like blood. Pig slashed at the throat. Or nosebleed. Mouthful of 2p coins. Not a world record. Element irons. Smelt. Slag heap.

Appearance: Compound. Slag heap. Bottle; slag heap.

Would you buy 2? Never ever. I haven't got coal-dust poisoning.

Would you buy 4? Maybe if you needed to extract some iron ore and other, iron based resources were running low.

Rating (out of 7): 1* tired of life? Try this!

Location:St Peters Crescent,Cardiff,United Kingdom

Nethergate Brewery - Old Growler 5.5%

Taste: This is smooth. Dark, malty, easy to drink - just how I like my Porter! The label says its a 'robust superior porter', which I just couldn't believe when it weighs in at a meagre 5.5%. I think it just about manages it though.

Appearance: Its dark, way darker than expected. I'm sure there's hints of chestnut in there somewhere too. Leaves a good frothy mess on the inside of the glass.

Would you buy 2? I didn't, but I wish I did.

Would you buy 4? 4 in a row! This just isn't that sort of beer, and I'm not that sort of man! Maybe if I was doing a weekly shop...

Rating (out of 7): 4**** Robust and superior it may be, but there's more robust and more superior out there.

The Kernel Brewery - IPA Black III 7.4%

Taste: The third incarnation of an already six star beer still has a brave smell and it's half a percent stronger this batch. That's a bonus.... My god! That's the best feeling beer I've ever tasted! It has the feel of cream. Cream that tastes like beer. It sticks all over your mouth touching every tastebud. Still tastes like coffee and yoghurt with a hop crumble.

Appearance: Black oil. I like that the three in the name is written in numerals. Like a film. Or a clock.

Would you buy 2? Yes please. A supping beer can't get any better.

Would you buy 4? Immediately.

Rating (out of 7): 6****** quite amazing.

Location:Victoria Rise,London,United Kingdom

Harviestoun - Old Engine Oil Porter 6%

Taste: oily rag. There's no doubt that it's been used to wipe down an old steam engine. Quite bitter. But pleasingly thick. Not bad at all.

Appearance: dark. Oil black. Good info on label.

Would you buy 2? yes. Happily.

Would you buy 4? Buying four really would be the ultimate reward. For the brewers.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** much better than the wet and wobbly whiskey aged one I had from harviestoun.

Location:Sofa

Mikkeller - Beer Hop Breakfast 7.5%

Taste: It's way dense.... Massy. It folds into your mouth. It's like slime or big goo. It won't go down. I physically have to suck. Smokey! It's like a bonfire being stamped out by teens. Metallic too, like girders. I. Ron. Butterfly. Hoppy and dry too.

Appearance: Black holes. Mysterious bottle.

Would you buy 2? Yes. But I wouldn't know where from. Oh, the beer boutique in Putney apparently.

Would you buy 4? Over time. Four in a row and you'd 'become' gravity. Eventually pushed down into a big thick paste.

Rating (out of 7): 5***** in hind-sight I don't think I would be able I take two in succession.

Location:Penwith Rd,London,United Kingdom